Breaking free

Feeling foolish, I must confess that I am often a prisoner of my own making.

Here is a fictional scenario:

I am driving in town when suddenly the car ahead of me and to my left decides to abruptly switch lanes, causing me to slam on my brakes to avoid a collision.

Adrenaline racing, I hear myself yelling (in my head), "WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHY DIDN'T YOU LOOK IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR BEFORE CHANGING LANES? YOU MUST HAVE FLUNKED DRIVER'S ED! OR, BETTER YET, YOU NEVER EVEN TOOK DRIVER'S ED! YOU NEED TO PARK IT AND THROW AWAY THE KEY!"

Before long, my non-verbal conversation begins to calm and is replaced with a more civilized muttering. "Why do people do that?" "He must have been talking on his cell phone or unwrapping his Big Mac. " Geeez.....

Without knowing it, I've wrapped myself tightly into a vortex of roller coaster emotions ranging from "I really don't need this added stress in my life right now" to "if 'they' don't get this talking-on-the-cell-phone thing under control, soon it will not even be safe to drive". (Be aware that I'm not even sure if the driver was actually talking on his cell phone. Perhaps he abruptly changed lanes to avoid hitting a huge pot hole or a DOT worker!)

The way I label reality is where I get stuck. By declaring a situation to be 'bad' or a person to be 'difficult', I end up with that exact result.

Using the above scenario, imagine this response:

"Wow! That driver nearly caused an accident. I'm sure glad I was paying attention and not talking on my cell phone just then. This is a good reminder for me to stay focused when driving."

A bit Pollyanna, I admit, but by responding instead of reacting, I avoided falling into the potential emotional quagmire of the experience. Be being in this calm state, my head is clear and I can take the next step forward.

This is HUGE for me! The art of allowing reality vs. fighting against it will allow me to move on after being smacked along-side the head with one of life's lessons.